Three months left. If I'm truly honest at this point, I am not sure how I'm going to make three more months. Even the simplest things sometimes seem so complicated these days. We went to a family festival-ish event this weekend, and the simple walk from the parking lot to the event about did me in. You know it's bad when my three kids (including the one who's just beginning to walk), are flying past me and I'm bringing up the rear. Waddling. Holding my belly. Hoping to somehow make it to the car before I fall apart!!!
I've all but given up exercise at this point. Ok, I keep trying to delude myself into believing I can still do it, but really every attempt ends in defeat. Which absolutely baffles me and causes me to be more sympathetic. I always exercised all the way to the end of pregnancy, but this time around, that just doesn't seem possible. I've always poo-poo'd walking as a form of exercise. But a simple walk across a parking lot right now makes me feel like I might have a baby sooner than I expect. It's so different than any of my other pregnancies that I don't even know how to explain it.
I've been thinking about the Duggars. A lot. I mean how on earth does a body have 19!!! babies? I just can't fathom it. I am feeling like this is about the extent of what my body can handle. I absolutely CAN NOT comprehend doing this 15 more times. How does your body hold the 19th one in there?
Thinking big picture, I've probably done less sitting on the couch during the course of this pregnancy than any of the others. As I learned during jury duty, I just don't lead a sedentary lifestyle. Not because I'm boasting about how active I am, but because 3 kids 5 and under just doesn't allow for that. And probably because of that very truth, this is the pregnancy in which I have felt the NEED to just sit on the couch and put my feet up more than anything.
I started back to work this week. (I use the word "work" loosely, as I only work one day a week.) Apparently most of the people I work with didn't know I was expecting. I had a brief "conversation" with a co-worker. It was so brief, in fact, that it probably took me longer to review it and make sure I was interpreting it correctly than the actual conversation itself.
In passing on the stairs, my co-worker says, "Oh. Going for number 4, hunh?"
Thinking quickly: what is she talking about, baby, oh yeah. Respond: "Yup."
"Wow."
Reading this replay does NOT do it justice. If only I could convey the tone behind that, "Wow." It was not really a "wow" response. Really, it said, "You're crazy. That's crazy. What are you thinking? You're nuts." Maybe even "You're stupid."
All that in those 3 simple letters. I wrote early on about the various reactions we were getting in telling people that we were once again expecting. This one, although much later, by far takes the cake in my book. It was the outright rudest response I've gotten. I may be crazy, but I am not stupid. I just love kids. And love being a mom. And can't imagine a house that isn't full of little bodies and all the chaos they bring. Bring. It. On.
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